Um Professional blogs

You are ready to leave the work, and you didn’t cook yet. You are about to pick up your kids from their afternoon school program, and suddenly you get a phone call. Your husband gives you a heads up that his sister’s family from a neighboring state is in town and is dropping by your home… tonight! And yes, they’re staying over! Don’t worry…at some point or another we’ve all been there….the unexpected house guest.

First of all, take a few deep breaths and remember the blessing. The worst thing to do is panic and begin complaining. Remember that the Prophet (SAW) said, “Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let them treat their guest generously.” (Al-Bukhari) All you need is the right intention… and everything will go smoothly.

Here are 10 tips that will help you keep your calm and bring out the inner domestic diva in you! Oh, and don’t forget to get your kids involved in being good hosts and hostesses!

• When your guest arrives, greet him/her with a warm welcome! Guests bring their own blessing from Allah SWT.  The righteous of the olden days would say that the guests bring their own rizq and leave with the sins of the host forgiven. So be gracious and look at it as an opportunity to get lots of blessings and to reconnect with that person.

• So to begin, formulate a quick menu. You will have to serve meals and snacks, so make a grocery list accordingly and go shopping. Or better yet, if you can delegate the shopping to someone else, you can save more time.

• Next, give your home a quick cleaning. No, you don’t need to vacuum every single corner or clean out your cabinets. Overall general appearance is the key. Don’t waste time trying to make everything perfect. Your home should look neat and presentable and that’s it.

• Do all your cooking prep earlier in the day so that there is less to do when you actually finish making the meal. This will give you less stress when you’re serving dinner, and will also allow you to spend more time talking to your guest than just cooking.

• Always try to keep some yummy and filling snacks handy in the pantry or the freezer. Things like frozen samosas or mozzarella sticks are great, because they’re not only filling and delicious, they’re a snap to prepare whenever anyone drops by.

• It’s a good idea to keep some extra linens and toiletries in the home. Extra blankets, pillows, and towels are great to keep on hand for overnight guests.

• You can have your children create a small basket of basic essentials for your guest by using mini or travel sized products. Be sure to include: toothpaste, unopened toothbrushes, soap, shampoo/conditioner, lotion, and a small hairbrush or comb.

• An extra added touch is to make a small basket of snacks for your guests and put it at their bedside. You can fill the basket with items such as fruits, nuts, chocolates, cookies, and bottled water.

• In terms of preparing the room in which your guest will be staying, a few simple touches can make a big difference. Leave some books or other reading material at their bedside. Brighten up the room with a simple small vase with some handpicked flowers from your garden. Put a scented candle or even a solid air freshener in the room. If you have an extra alarm clock put that there too. And if you really want to add the cherry on top, leave them a little note on the bedside telling them how happy you are to have them in your home and that you look forward to spending time with them, better still, have your children write the note or draw them a cute picture!

Umm Professional blogs

The phone is not the boss of you!  Who ever would have thought that a little bitty piece of plastic could hold so much power? We all have a love- like relationship with our phones.  We want to reach and check with the baby sitter on our children’s status but we don’t want our secretaries to find us to update us with more work.  We adore the fact that we can call grandparents to wish them Eid Mubarak over the miles, but we don’t want the phone ringing and spoiling our intimate dinners.  It’s great that you can read random text messages privately in a conference that your husband sends telling you how much he cherishes you, and no one will know as you blush silently.  Still there are days when the phone can start eating into your time.  Here are some nifty moves to make sure tiny smiles stay put on faces even when the office calls.

1. Make a back up of the numbers you have on your phone or sim card. Should your colleague happen to splash cappuccino over your cell phone while illustrating a point at a meeting, or you drop it in a puddle while getting out of a cab- at least you know your important clientele can still be reached when you need to confirm your next business lunch. There are various ways of doing this; you could download the information directly from your cell phone to the computer (refer to your service/phone providers for specifics), save phone numbers on your sim card (in countries where it applies) or get yourself a blackberry- it allows you to sync your contact list to your email address book.

2. Keeping an extra charger in your car or at the office is a small way to make sure you don’t hit panic mode should your phone run out off juice just before your next presentation.

3. Use the phone to let your child talk to his/her friends and family.  It’s a great way to teach telephone etiquette.  First try doing a trial run by demonstrating how to respond when picking up the call, asking about others, and then being clear as to who you want to speak to.  Ask the child to model your language.  Discuss with them what they want to include in the conversation, and then teach them patiently how to dial.  It may actively stifle moaning if they get involved and don’t feel left out.

4. A good way to maintain peace at home and arrest those rolling eyes is to simply ‘ask’ if you may take the call.  Your husband may not concede every time, but the world will not come to an abrupt stop with one missed phone call.  It may not seem obvious at that time but there may be a lot of stress that could be diffused by simply not answering that call immediately.

5. Leave the phone at home when you’re out with the kids.  I started doing this when my office kept calling me pre and post office hours.  I love my job and I like taking those calls but that means they eat into my child’s ‘Us’ time.  Instead I leave the phone at home while I drop my child to school because I’m not tempted to ‘fix’ things that my office throws at me early in the morning.  Anything important can wait till I drop her.  My 4 year old used this time to memorize mummy’s phone number, tell me about her dreams and learn counting the different colored cars on the way to kindergarten.  On our way back I heard who brought the most interesting lunch, and whose clips were very sparkly. Precious moments like these won’t just happen, you need to allocate time so your child can talk knowing she won’t be interrupted.

6. Use the phone to set an alarm 10 mins before each Salah time, download surahs, and surf the web for Islamic information.  Get technology to help you come closer to your Deen, in your free time.

Tell us of your own techniques to avoid a battle of the babble!

Umm Professional blogs

I have a friend who is a talented graphic designer Mashallah, and he has shared some of his beautiful Eid Card designs with us to download from his website here. He has uploaded some lovely high quality card designs for all to use.

I am sure you will find them very useful now that Eid is literally around the corner and as we scram last minute to get our cards and gifts ready for family and friends!

Umm Professional blogs

It’s always fun preparing for Eid, and even more so when you are preparing Eid gifts for your non-Muslim friends, neighbors or teachers- you can use it as an excuse to do “The Dawah Power” as I call it to teach my kids the importance of spreading Islam the friendly way. Don’t make excuses, ” I don’t have money or the time to give anything to my non-Muslim friends-they would never be interested in Islam anyway…”

In this difficult financial time, we can still find ways to give a little, and still get a big smile and appreciation from our neighbors and friends. My favorite ideas are made by the children, who have the zeal of giving. Here are a few ideas from different sisters who have emailed us…

1. Eid Mubarak E-Card ($0- free!)- one sister emailed her non-Muslim family members and friends Eid Mubarak e-cards and they responded, “Thank you-What is Eid Mubarak?” Ahh…now all the possible answers to that question!

List of Best e-Eid Card Sites:

www.123greetings.com

www.eidgreetings.com

www.eidwishes.com

2. Sweet Treats ($2.50 per gift -cake mix, paper box, cellophane wrapper, ribbons)- This sister found cupcakes, brownies, and muffins to be an inexpensive but well appreciated gift. “Even if you use instant cake mix, you can’t go wrong with decorated frosting. Put cupcake with frosting on a nice paper plate with cellophane wrapper, or muffins in a bakery box” she explains. One cake mix box can make enough cup cakes or muffins for about two neighbors….that’s less than $1.50 per person!

3. Eid Cake ($3.00 for cake mix and frosting)- You just don’t have time putting the batter in those cupcake liners? Just pour it on to a square or circular pan, and get your kids to frost and decorate it. Says one young chef here who made a desert and date palm tree scene on the cake with fruit loops and dates, “We just took whatever we could find in our kitchen! Our downstairs neighbors’ kids were ecstatic, and did not want to eat it because they said they didn’t want to mess it up!!”

4. Eid Gifts ($6.00 for gift wrap- bought here)-This clever mom looked for any stashed away gift items that she had in the attic or basement that she had not used and were brand new. She found perfumes, dishes, pocket books, scarves, framed art, vases. Then she wrapped them up with colorful gift wrappers and the children gave it to the astonished neighbors. She gave a short explanation, “After Hajj, we celebrate our Holiday called Eid. We give gifts to our family member and friends, and we just want to let you know we consider you as part of our family.”  Suddenly your unknown neighbor is your best friend!

5. Fruit Bouquet ($5.00-$10.00)- If you want to get a little more fancy as this sister attempted to make her own fruit arrangement with the help of her little girl. She explains, “What started off as fruit kebabs became fruit flower gifts. Actually my friend showed up a day before Eid with box full of fruit. Knowing there was no way we could eat all these fruit, we decided to give them away. I got some ideas from fruit decoration companies (They charge $50-$100!), and took out some old vases, Styrofoam and bunch of sticks, and put my little assistant to work. She happily stuck the grapes one by one, and after she completed them, decided to eat them as well. Oh, well… that’s what I get for relying on ‘child labor’!”

Now I have a beautiful book bin to keep all the library books my kids borrow. No more running around the house and searching for “that” book at the last minute. Once we have finished reading the book, putting it away is now as easy as 1,2,3. When it’s time to return them to the library we know exactly where to head and no more overdue fees!

Umm Professional blogs

I had so much fun this week- I got organized! I must say it feels liberating! I got my kids to help me. While the talk of the town may be about Halloween costumes and last minute candy runs, how do you get your children to help you with this boring job? By making it fun of course!

Getting Organized Project #1: Dive into Fall  - Book Bins

So I asked my kids to cover up a snack cardboard box with color construction paper. Then I asked them to cut out various shaped leaves on different color paper with the help of the downloadable template listed below.  They decorated the box with these colorful fall leaves. Easy.

If you want to make your little one cut out the leaves by himself- then a fast and easy way is to lightly paste one leaf printout on color paper and have the kid cut on the lines of the leaf. When the entire leaf is cut- peel off the template and voila you’ll have a beautiful cut out leaf!

Now I have a beautiful book bin to keep all the library books my kids borrow. No more running around the house and searching for “that” book at the last minute. Once we have finished reading the book, putting it away is now as easy as 1,2,3. When it’s time to return them to the library we know exactly where to head and no more overdue fees!

Getting Organized Project #2: Button up for Fall – Folders

So our library books are now organized, but I wanted to help the kids organize their paperwork too. So we made these really cute folders….I cut out the shape of a fall tree that they pasted on the folder cover (I have made a template for you- download it below).

I also gave them felt to cut out leaf shapes and lots of colorful buttons to decorate. Seeing how well they turned out- I’ve requested them to make me some!

PS: Glue the buttons with a glue gun or white glue and allow it to dry completely before you use the folders.

Fall Tree Template and Leaves Download Here

Umm Professional blogs

We may be a new breed of women altogether.  The first generation of women born into such comfort, and equipped to pour our talents and resources into society.  We have our touch phones, tele-conferencing, webinars and may practice marine biology or environmental law.  We have the choice to stay home and raise good strong stock for our ummah, and we have the support to work and in diverse fields as role models for our children.  It’s an intriguingly complicated process that every professional Muslim needs to balance in order to sustain optimum contentment.  As much as our niyaah is to juggle everything meticulously – there are days (many days) when the office will ask you to pitch in more, your husband will need you to do some of his chores, the kids will meet a child with a bad attitude at school but not be able to verbalize it.

Life is all about tackling the challenges, but they have a sneaky way of catching dedicated professionals off guard.  Below are a few strategies that helped me keep things working well:

1. A well planned routine makes children feel at ease.  They feel more comfortable when some things are predictable, dependable and easy to achieve.  Busy mothers can rely on a lot more cooperation from little helpers if the child is clued in as to what the mother needs. Our typical routine? School pick-up, snack break in the car, play at the park/library meeting with a friend, home.  Once home, downtime with a toy /book, sit down to complete homework and attend the online Quran class, a warm bubbly bath, dinner, a snuggly story time and finally time to drift off to a dreamy state of sleep.  There were  days, even though I felt the fatigue in my muscles, the thought of which story we would read that evening and what discussion, giggles, cuddles and cuteness would follow, would put the spring back in my step.  Office calls would have to wait post 9pm when my kid is fast asleep.
2. Mention obligations and duties that you have towards your home and family at the office from day one.  I’ve had a number of friends tell me how well that has worked for them.  The office is prepared by advance knowledge that you may need time off, they may keep in mind other people who can pick up your missed hours, and they know they can rely on you to be there for them when these obligations have been met.  Very often your boss or team leader will have similar responsibilities at home and be understanding as long as you are clear as to what it is.  An unwell mother, a child with short school hours, or a spouse who cannot pick up the child from school.  No one likes being caught at the tenth hour with a work load that you cannot complete.  Factor in all these points right at the beginning for harmony at the office place that spills into the home too.
3. Invest in great childcare.  This is one of those times when penny pinching can cause sores.  If you want to perform well at work, you need to know that a capable, responsible, creative and sincere person is taking care of the most precious people in your life.  Take your time to interview baby sitters, check out playgrounds, and suss out teachers.  There is nothing worse than having to coax your child to go to school every morning while you hurry to make it to work.  If you have grandparents who vibe well with your kids, you are blessed.  Remember to thank them often and not to overload them with more than car pooling, story telling and cuddles.  Keep in mind their age and stamina.

Have you found anything that helped you strike that critical balance of home and work? Share here with other dedicated mothers who read our blog and spread your balancing techniques.

Umm Professional blogs

Eid is finally here …. Bringing with it a sense of renewed hope of what we as a family can achieve.  Having read shelves and shelves of books on how to raise a healthy family, I feel grateful that my faith has  built –  in practical steps to do just that.  What am I talking about? ….well there are lessons for all during Ramadan.  We are programming our children for success as they live and breathe Ramadan.

• When my child accompanied us to Taraweeh salah this blessed month, she learned sabr.  The whole ambiance was so breath taking that she made a conscious effort not to make a sound, and to follow the Imam as much as her little body would allow her
• While she plays with her friends, I often find her role playing the part of the Mu’adhin by calling out the adhan
• The lollipop on my pillow was a surprise treat from her.  My child learned to be considerate
• As the mails full of family photographs and nasheeds fill my in-box, she has learned that as a community we network and support each other with the most beautiful greetings
• As she watched the men hurry off to the masjid and the women multi task so as not to miss any time in ibaadah, she has learned how important time management is
• Each day as iftar time neared, she would responsibly hand out equal number of dates to each family member. She understood the meaning of sharing
• When my child helped wrap Eid presents for less fortunate Muslim children, she learned to be grateful for what Allah has blessed her with
• This morning, when she gave up her Eidee to place instead in the masjid Zakah box. I was moved and teary eyed at her generosity and selflessness

In one month my child has had a comprehensive course in all the things that are most meaningful in life. She has understood our cultural strengths, she has witnessed the virtue of punctuality, the importance of anti- immediate gratification, learned to share her blessings with others and above all,  she is excited about her Muslim identity.   There cannot be a bigger gift than this.

And now it’s time to party…….EID MUBARAK EVERYONE!!!!

Meet the Characters of JannahSteps…

Umm Professional

Meet our Suze Orman of the Muslim world. She somehow has everything organized; her schedules are not always neat but are up to date. She is a confident and hard working Muslim business woman.

Placed on her desk are her never ending piles of folders, computer, the latest business report and a little alarm clock that goes off at Dhuhr time. On the phone or in a meeting, her voice is structured with a level of sophistication and humor.

Her day starts at dawn as she prepares for the rustle and bustle ahead. She whips up her children to a Muslim day care and Islamic school, and is off to work. She has watchful eyes on her children’s issues and tries very hard to keep on top of it all.  She knows how a parent should deal with educators and school administrators. She keeps in touch with them via her blackberry as she helps them prepare for their annual fundraiser.

During the day, she jumps from one conference meeting to another, and takes her lunch break at Dhuhr time so she can fulfill her Islamic obligations. When she gets a moment, she turns to quranexplorer.com to catch up on some quiet Quran reading.

She’s an expert on time management and delegating tasks. She interacts with other creative women professionals and she works twice as hard to create clever business project plans to please her clients. She reads a lot to keep on top of the latest business news and is currently working on a secret project for Jannahsteps.

Umm Professional is the business voice for the Jannahsteps.